Weird sales patterns and Simon Amstel
Posted on Sunday, August 15th, 2010
This is a bit weird: I’ve just looked at Amazon.co.uk – OK I admit it, I do that quite a lot; it’s a bit addictive when paying your mortgage depends upon the results – and Outlaw, which was published last year, is selling more than Holy Warrior, published last week. At time of writing Book 1 was 1,294 in the sales ranking, and Book 2 was 1,848. Something odd is going on. Are people ignoring Holy Warrior and ordering Outlaw instead? Why?
On a totally unconnected note: I watched Grandma’s House yesterday, which I’d recorded on Sky Plus. For those of you who don’t know, this is a new sitcom vehicle for Simon Amstel, erstwhile presenter of Never Mind the Buzzcocks. I thought Simon was brilliant on that show but this sitcom was dire. It’s about a presenter of a show pretty much the same as Buzzcocks who quits to do something meaningful with his life. Basically Simon playing (with?) himself.
“I could be an actor,” Simon’s character (called Simon) says. His mum replies scathingly: “You can’t act!”
Never was a truer word written in a TV script. While Simon was great at taking the piss out of popstars, the boy really cannot act to save his life. Between pouting and smirking, he looked, almost all the time, whatever line he was delivering, as if he was about to start giggling. For God’s sake, go back to Buzzcocks, Simon, or stand-up comedy or something, and leave acting to the professionals. You’re just embarrassing yourself.
Simon is Gay and Jewish. Therefore, any criticism is both, anti-semitic and homophobic, as such, he is beyond reproach.
Whilst you write very well do not provoke the “powers that be”. It would be a shame to lose a talented author over “politics.
That said, in my most humble opinion, Simon would not have graced our T.V screens if he was a “bog standard” “White Boy”.
Enough said. Somewhat ironically where do you feel “Simon De Amstel” would fit unto you current saga. Not much use in Clifford’s Tower, indeed not much use anywhere.
Regards,
Michael
Hi Michael,
I think you are being a bit unfair. Personally, I don’t care what his sexuality is, nor do I care about his religion. I thought he was great on Buzzcocks – extremely funny and a brilliant host. The boy has real talent. I’m just saying he can’t act.
I tried acting once (amateur dramatics; a Pinter play) and I was truly terrible at it – and I swore a mighty oath never to disgrace the stage again.
I just wish Simon would do something similar!
Best wishes, Angus
I contributed to those Outlaw figures by picking it up for my holiday — thoroughly enjoyed it. I loved all things Robin Hood as a kid, and it’s rekindled my fascination with the myth.
Looking forward to picking up the second book (and seeing what you do with him after the Crusade — assuming it is wrapped up in book 2.)
Best of luck with it all,
Mike Revell
Very odd sales indeed!
And as for Simon, I watched his new sitcom the other night and wasn’t amused by the material, but, like you, more amused by the lack of talent. Seriously, it was like one of my 5th grade drama classes – and they were better!
Cheers Mike. I’m afraid, although each book is a stand-alone, the story doesn’t stop with Book 2 (Holy Warrior). I’ve got another three RH books in the pipeline, maybe more if they sell well. Hope you like the series. All the best, Angus
@Alex – can you give me the name/address of Dave Milliband’s blog. I’d love to read your stuff. Well done once again, Angus
Sorry Angus — I meant the Crusade story that Book 2 deals with, not the entire series.
I should have said I’m looking forward to seeing what you do with Robin after the Crusade, assuming the Crusade gets wrapped up in Book 2. But, of course, it might not do.
(And good to hear there are three more in the pipeline! I enjoyed the first a lot.)
Hi Mike,
I’m leaving a gap in the story after the Battle of Arsuf, but there is plenty more action that I’m not covering. Book 3 opens back in England but there are allusions to the rest of the Crusade and the journey home, which I’m hoping one day to write as a book. I only have a contract to write five books so I’m setting Book 3 in England and Germany (it’s all about Richard being captured and Robin being outlawed again). Book 4 deals with Richard fighting Philip of France in Normandy, and Book 5 is about the run up to Magna Carta with Robin and Alan as middle-aged guys sorting out King John and laying the foundation of law in England. As I say, depends on how well the books do, but I’d really like to go back and fill in the gaps at a later date.
Hope I’m not giving too much away. Best, Angus
This is the website, but it’s not published yet. http://www.davidmiliband.net/
I’ll facebook you when it’s finally up. My one-time blog is merely about my story with some BNP’s and how I benifited from some course I took – but obviously the creative writer within me made it into a thriller!
Alex
I am enjoying your first book Outlaw which i bought with a special Tesco deal of both your books together.Maybe this causes the sales figures to show more Book 1′s have been sold then book 2′s,as that was the front book in the package when infact they were both together.
Hi Boomtowndave,
Nice idea but I doubt it. The sales figures I’m looking at are on Amazon.co.uk – rather than supermarket sales. Actually the numbers fluctuate wildly day by day on Amazon and sometimes Book1 is doing better, sometimes Book 2. I should just be really grateful that people are buying them, I guess. Glad you are enjoying Outlaw.
Best wishes, Angus
Hi Angus,
I think there might be a mixup. Because when i finnished Outlaw, at the back of the book it said,i hope you enjoy the next book in the series, Crusader, published in 2010.
So i’ve been looking for a book by that name lol. I take it the next book is Holy Warrior? Please mail me so i get the right book, until then i think i’ll read Outlaw again, it was such a fantastic read!
Hi Kat, the next book is called Holy Warrior. I was going to call it Crusader but I discovered that there were several other books out there already called Crusader, so I changed the name. Sorry for the confusion. Hope you enjoy Holy Warrior.
Best wishes, Angus