God bless America

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Oh say can you see, by the dawn’s early light, What so proudly we hailed at the twilight’s last gleaming . . . Let’s have three rousing cheers for the good ol’ US of A! God bless America! Hurray for Hollywood! Throw your panties on the stage for Barak Obama! Yup, you’ve guessed it: I […]

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Insanely brilliant 3: money-grubbing MPs

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As yet another depressingly grubby scandal breaks over Westminster – yesterday it was MPs boasting to undercover journos that they would happily get stuff sorted for them in Parliament in exchange for buckets of cash – it seems to me that our democratically elected representatives have never been held this low in public regard in […]

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Insanely brilliant 2: fixing football

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OK, before I give you my idea, I have to set out the problem. I hate football. Apart from all the truly appalling people involved – endlessly shagging each others wives, or beating them up, getting married in tacky outfits, and hogging all the space in the newspaper sports sections – and the obscene amounts […]

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Sick as a Polynesian parrot

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Hola cabrones, You may have been wondering why some drivel I wrote about the Baftas two weeks ago hasn’t been superseded by anything more worthy recently on this site. I guess some of you, those with the more lurid, prurient imaginations might have suspected that the delightful actress Carey Mulligan had contacted me after reading […]

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